When I looked at my face in the mirror I had to smile. The results of eating my mother were still evident I reluctantly washed my face, shaved, and th...n took a shower. When I came downstairs my mother was sitting at the kitchen table having coffee. She looked up and smiled."My, but you're up early," she said."I know. I couldn't bear to be away from you any longer," I said and laughed. I'm not sure she knew how true that was. I walked over and leaned down and kissed her. It wasn't the typical. He already figured that Anna would not survive. Now Carl was determined that neither would Veronika, especially since he was unlikely to get away. Carl lifted up the knife and began to lunge towards Veronika. The Ranger immediately fired his .40 caliber semiautomatic Smith & Wesson pistol twice at Carl, hitting him both times. Carl felt two heavy blows against the side of his chest as he lunged for Veronika. He was aiming his knife for her heart, but the impact of the bullets pushed. In somerespects, he was closer to me than Austin was. Were these feelings thesame feelings that I had for Austin now? Or were they more?I was so confused as I got ready for bed that evening. If I thoughtbecoming a girl had been hard, then I was kidding myself. Doing that hadbeen child's play compared to what I was going through now.---After church the next day Ethan and Emily came by my house again. Istruggled the whole time we were together to try and determine what to doabout Ethan. I knew. But was I already too late? They say you don't know what you've got until it's gone. I hadn't realized how much I took for granted that Dawn would wait for me forever. And now that I didn't have that certainty anymore, I desperately wished I could have come to this realization long ago. And it was depressing to think that I may have missed out on the greatest love of my life.I happened to be in a hippie store when that particular depressing thought struck me. I closed my eyes and tried to will.
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