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" She looked at him with pentrating brown eyes. "Yeah, I'm not looking to meet anyone. Just want to read and do my laundry without some asshole who ju...t wants to screw me making stupid conversation in a misguided attempt to get laid." Jake flicked his smoke away and smiled at her. "Fuck you, bitch!" He walked back inside, leaving her spluttering outside. She came back in, back stiff with anger. She ignored him for the next hour. Jake was seething. Some people were just rude for no reason. So. Her phone answered on the fourth ring.“Hi babe, is that you all dressed up like a slut now!” Krystal giggled.“Yeah!” I giggled back “Doug is running about the house with a raging hard on! If I can get that effect after ten years of marriage, then hopefully someone I’ve never met will almost explode!” I laughed wickedly.“Tell me about it! Jeff has been pawing at me as he helped me into my lingerie! I’ve got for wet look black this evening!” Krystal confirmed.“Stockings?” I quizzed.“Of course. Our problems started about two years ago, when for some reason we just suddenly stopped talking to each other. At the time I didn't know why and I didn't know which of us started it. After a while the silence when we were together got so uncomfortable that we started avoiding each other around the house. This situation lasted for about two months and ended one night after we had been to a party. At the party I had had quite a bit to drink and as it turned out so did Pam. We were both feeling. The commander before me had guards on the bench, so I just kept it going.”After contacting three previous commanders as well, and still getting the same answer, the new commander finally found a retired General (nearly 100 years old) and asked; “Sir, I am the new commander at the base you were in charge of 60 years ago. I found two men assigned to stand guard on a bench near the mess hall. Can you please tell me why?”After a pause, the General replied; “What? Is the paint still.
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